People of all ages play video games. I hate to break it to you sticklers, but they’re not just for kids, and I hate to break it to you pros, but they’re not just for hardcore gamers.

Before the evolution and popularization of online gaming, this wasn’t something too many people thought or cared about. You played your own game and no one else imposed upon it. But now that we gamers have become more social creatures, seeking the company of others in-game has become the best and the worst part of playing online.

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I can enjoy a good single player game as much as the next gamer. In fact, being by myself can sometimes be cathartic. But only sometimes.

Having an added interactive personality or two to spice up the time you spend with your favorite pixels? Why, who could resist? Friends, and people in general, make gaming multidimensional. They point out things you may have missed, spend joyous hours entertaining you, share the journey of your characters from one point to another, and make you feel like not so much of a geeky gamer freak because hey – you’ve got friends who play too, so spending twenty hours a week or more on an activity atypical to most people in society isn’t quite so lonely an affair.

My personal favorite? Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions on Ventrilo during PvP combat.

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I like to try to get to know my competition. Get into their heads, figure out their personalities–size up the competition if you will. It’s an important pre-game ritual. I’ll look over gamercards, avatars, character choices, and most importantly, their names. Sometimes, I find genuinely creative and interesting names.

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Are you bored with your job? Perhaps you’re tired of taking orders from someone you hate? Or maybe you don’t even have a job at all? Regardless of your situation, if you want work, I have great news, dear reader! Our inbox has recently been inundated with requests for people to fill some out of the ordinary job positions.

You’d just better act quickly before they’re gone!

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Princesses. For the most part, they’re nothing but trophy wives for video game protagonists; vapid and spineless pieces of admittedly hot meat. Many, aside from their glowing cardboard cut-out personalities, are also great at providing little or no help in sticky situations that they frequently get themselves into. Furthermore, after risking life and limb for these harlots, the biggest reward you get is a peck on the cheek. Well, okay, sometimes, you also get some sickeningly cute giggle or a bat of an eyelash. Sometimes. That’s if you can manage to behave.

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Dialogue. You can find it in any game. Whether they are seen or read, every game has quotes; some are memorable, some are easily forgotten. Maybe we experience it while obliterating our friends on XBL, or while we’re being chased by ghouls down a dark hallway with only a baseball bat for defense. Sometimes it waits, hidden in the depths of a game’s menus, quests, inventories, narration–or as easter eggs to be discovered and enjoyed. Any gamer who has ever laughed, wanted to break things, or felt their heartstrings being tugged at while enjoying a particular game was most likely influenced by a demonstration of superb writing.

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