Aging with the GameJuly 13th, 2008 by Mercedes
Del.icio.us | Digg | Technorati | Reddit | Stumble Upon
People of all ages play video games. I hate to break it to you sticklers, but they’re not just for kids, and I hate to break it to you pros, but they’re not just for hardcore gamers.
Before the evolution and popularization of online gaming, this wasn’t something too many people thought or cared about. You played your own game and no one else imposed upon it. But now that we gamers have become more social creatures, seeking the company of others in-game has become the best and the worst part of playing online.
We’ve all had our run-ins with those annoying kids up way past their bedtimes on Xbox Live, or that old lady in WoW whose reaction time is… well, nonexistent because she doesn’t even seem to react at all. Or maybe that creepy couple in their 30’s playing every online game together, popping up in your path when you least expect it like those twins from The Shining. From these encounters and plenty of others, we’ve become annoyingly aware of the sometimes-present age gap between players. I know that I cringe when I find my way into a lobby with a high-pitched voice screeching curses and racial slurs, or when my tank is dicking around and I realize it’s Friday night (no school tomorrow!). Really, though, does age really precede ineptitude or immaturity? Do we have a right to discriminate against people in a game because of how old they are before we bear witness to their actual behavior or demeanor?
I’ve had my own share of unfair treatment stemming from my age. You’ll encounter those types of groups or GM’s who warmly greet you with, “Wait, how old are you? If you’re a kid, forget it.” And I guess it’s an understandable precaution, if you’ve ever played with a young’un who has ruined your game with immature antics like team-killing or standing in front of anyone who’s trying to take aim. But tons of “kids” have potential to be remarkably mature or skilled. After a certain point, how old or young someone may be has no bearing on how they play the game; 20-somethings have just as much potential to freak out about losing their kill streak as teenagers do. I sometimes would resort to lying about my age, saying I was sixteen or seventeen instead of twelve just so I could get a shot at playing a game with some people, so does asking someone how old they are truly even prevent mishaps?
At the opposite end of the spectrum, older gamers get a bad rap for being unskilled, not knowing enough about the game, and 
just for gaming period. People seem to have grown a little more accepting of adult gamers, as both the market and the games become more mature, but naysayers and non-believers still sit agape when they find out their guildmate who’s helping them level their alts is a 42 year-old woman. Some claim they should be doing something else with their time, like raising their kids or getting a job. A couple months ago, someone on WoW told me he thought it was weird that he saw a married couple playing together.
“Why?” I asked.
“I dunno o.O just cuz… don’t they have anything better to do?”
“Like what, have sex?”
“O.o I didn’t want to say it… but yeah.”
“Well, everyone is entitled to have fun however they like, don’t you think?”
Sometimes new-gen gamers forget that video games have been around for decades, and players who were then picking up their Atari joysticks to play Pac-Man are now twenty-five years older. Kids have become adults, and adults have become older adults; it’s part of life. Gaming does not have an expiration date.
Some of us can remember acting like morons online when we were fourteen. We can remember ignoring a message from somebody because they sounded a little too young or old and we just didn’t want to deal with the baggage. But we all have to remember that gaming isn’t only for one type of person. It’s not only for a certain age-group or demographic. It’s a hobby, a pastime, a skill, an occupation, a passion. Despite those ESRB ratings (another story for another day), on a whole, it’s for everyone.
July 14th, 2008 at 5:03 am
Good article. I’ve met a few individuals in WoW who were playing great and acted nice and friendly, and then later learned that they were 15 or so while I thoughtthey would be somewhere around their mid twenties. I’ve also met 30 year olds who have been acting like 10 year olds… So yeah.
July 14th, 2008 at 5:47 am
I think it’s fair to ignore messages that seem immature. I mean, when your communicating with someone online text is your primary means of talking to them. If what they write is immature then surely this is akin to hanging around with a squeaky voiced ten year old in the real world?
I really hate it however when younger people try bump up their perceived age by simply yelling homophobic and racist slurs. If they’re going to try and befriend older gamers then try talking like a normal human being?
It’s very difficult for me to be apprehensive of older gamers, for the sole reason that a widening age demographic is certainly a good thing for the whole culture of gaming. We must remember that people of all ages have the potential to suck at games.
At any rate, I don’t play with a headset, so I avoid many ff these problems entirely.
July 14th, 2008 at 6:56 am
Just discovered this blog–awesome. Interesting post–and yes, gamers need to be judged individually.
I think online gaming in particular is going to attract a portion of gamers–regardless of age–who are going to succumb to the rule that Internet Audience+Anonymity=Jerk. Even as many cool people you’re going to find at an MMORPG or the like, you’re going to find a large portion of both 13-year-olds who think they can convince people they’re “mature” because of the swear words they get away with because “no one knows who they are” and 20, 30, 40, 50 year olds who act exactly the same who also let their worst character traits take over because they feel they can’t be “caught.”
Wonder what would happen if you were forced to reveal your true age and gender in an online game — not that I think that would necessarily be the right thing to do, re: privacy, but it’d be an interesting experiment.
As for gaming as a whole, I just wish MARKETERS, let alone anyone else, would get it through their heads that the majority of video gamers are in fact over the age of 25 (if not 30, IIRC).
July 14th, 2008 at 8:24 am
I think age can often give some indication to a person but it is far from absolute law. I’m 15 and when most people online find that out they reply with something along the lines of “Wow.. seriously.. I just assumed.. nevermind” or straight out compliment me on my maturity and skill. I have another friend who is 15 and is a member of an adults only guild but they made an exception for him because of his skill and maturity.
That isn’t to say I haven’t met my share of people my age or even older who insist on playing music through their mike until every single person in the game mutes them.
I also find it strange to see older gamers, but I do understand if gaming is what they like then they should be able to enjoy it freely. I met one person once who I knew was atleast 50 although I never got an absolute number who had 4 decked out raid toons on WoW. If he can keep up, what’s to stop him.
July 14th, 2008 at 9:04 am
Selphie- Thanks
I’m glad you see what I mean.
Jon- I totally agree with you about the maturity thing. It just goes to show you that no matter how old someone is, it’s their maturity level that counts. I will ignore an immature message not because I figure the sender is young but merely because I don’t want to deal with immaturity, ignorance, and/or stupidity.
Nime- I’m always surprised when people are accepting just because I would rarely get so lucky when I was younger. Even if I had talked to and played with people online for months and they knew me as mature, once they got wind of how old I was, they’d say, “Wow. I never would have figured,” which I took to be a compliment at the time, but they would slowly stop talking to me thereafter. It was really frustrating and I just wish people would never ask, sometimes. I think if you prove yourself to be mature and skilled, the number, no matter how low or high, shouldn’t count against you. I’m really happy you’ve encountered people who like you for who you are and not how old you are.
July 14th, 2008 at 11:18 am
DQ- I’m glad you stumbled upon GDG, welcome! You should definitely check out our forums if you like what you read here. And thanks for reading
I think maybe people would be surprised to know that a lot of the people they play with aren’t exactly who you think they are, and not in the creepy, I’m-gonna-stalk-you-I’m-a-crazy-guy way. If everyone admitted their age and gender after playing with someone, I bet there would be a lot more 30, 40, and 50 year-olds gaming than everyone thinks.
July 15th, 2008 at 5:49 am
My stock answer to people asking how old I am is: I’m old enough not to worry about how old people are.
For the curious amongst you, I’m 43. I’ve been a hardcore gamer for 25 years, and no, I don’t look or act like the hacker guy from South Park’s World of Warcraft episode! Neither am I a sad person with ‘No Life’ TM.
July 15th, 2008 at 9:18 am
Well its just one of those things that culturally we haven’t been shown adults playing games, so these responses aren’t unexpected.
Go ahead and do your own content analysis of the family TV time or the popular tween and teen shows, and toss movies in there too. Then get back to me with how often you see a videogame, and how often you see an adult with a videogame. I’d have to go trolling thru LexisNexis (which I don’t feel like at the moment) to find the study, but someone did, and they had another qualifier citing the reaction of the adults to the games and was overwhelmingly negative.
So culture has a big part in it. Especially when more and more in this age we’re only getting our culture from entertainment and advertising. The days in the west of getting your culture from your community are fading fast.
July 15th, 2008 at 4:57 pm
The ESA (http://www.theesa.com/) has done studies on the average age of gamers, but publishes a yearly report, which some of you mind find of interest.
The page with the summary, and the link to the actual report can be found at http://www.theesa.com/facts/gameplayer.asp
The average game player is 33, and 26% of all people who play games are over 50, up from only 9% in 1999, but, as George points out, advertising dollars aren’t picking up on this trend very quickly.
Also, age factoring into online games reminds me of an amazing conversation I had when I was starting one of my very first WoW characters.
A: So, I’m new to this game, and only 13, is there anything I should know about?
Me: Welcome aboard. The game does a pretty good job of explaining things to you as you go, so I wouldn’t worry about it too much yet.
B: And you know, we’re always glad to have an articulate person on board. Some 13 year olds can be way more mature than some 22 year olds.
A: Yeah, thanks! Say, does anybody watch the AFL?
C: afl/ thas gayy
Me: Um… C, how old are you?
C: 22 why
Me: ….
July 15th, 2008 at 7:34 pm
vlad- Keep on keepin’ on, man. It’s everyone’s prerogative to do what makes him/her happy, and I’m really glad you’ve found something that does.
GeorgeR- The Wii has definitely been marketed toward families, which is kinda neat. But even so, that marketing shows adults playing with kids just to satisfy the kids. The commercials make me feel like without kids, the parents would just go back to doing something else rather than gaming. I wish they would show that adults genuinely enjoy video games. The only time I ever see adults playing video games alone on TV or in movies is to poke fun at them; it’s the guy playing an MMO and hiding it from his wife, or something. Come ON! Give games a little more credit!
William- Ah, the classic, “THATS GAY DUDE”. I love it when kids upstage fully-grown adults however they can. More power to them.
July 17th, 2008 at 8:21 am
Once again, I stand amazed that if a married couple sacks out on the sofa and watches every single prime time television show together, they have a normal, healthy relationship, and no one even thinks of asking them whether they have something better to do with their time. If they play MMORPGs together, they’re creepy and need something better to do with their lives. WHY, GOD? WHY?
I know of at least five married couples who play together in my guild. Three of the five have kids, and play after the kids have gone to bed. It was a hobby before they married and had kids, and remains a fun hobby for them now. I do not get why this is so difficult for people to understand, nor do I understand the assumption that if they are playing MMORPGs together, they are never ever getting it on. Exactly how much time do these questioners think sex takes? It is totally inconcievable that the couple had sex and THEN logged on? Or is going to have celebratory YAY WE DOWNED ARCHIMONDE sex? Or perhaps angry Illidan Stormrage kicked our asses sex? Is the assumption that if you’re not having an all night every-night unf marathon, preventing you from touching a computer ever, that your marriage is not healthy? WHY GOD? WHY?
I also know several parents who play with their kids, and were excited to find some common ground there. One of the married couples in my guild has the entire family online. The grandparents, also a married couple, play too, and both children and their spouses play. This naturally creates friction when they want to run a five-man and have six people, but otherwise they have a great time playing together as a family. I know a lot of families who would LOVE to spend that much time chatting and laughing with their children, but the kids don’t want anything to do with them. One of the couples mentioned above doesn’t play WoW with the kids, but mentioned once on vent that they do play Rock Band as a family of four, and have a great time doing it.
July 17th, 2008 at 11:14 am
Alison- I’ve tried to get my parents to play video games, but they’re a little out of the loop technologically and don’t have the patience to acknowledge the dexterity that goes into them. They kind of just expect to button-mash and get results, or they react too slowly. I know that when I have kids I’ll still play video games, with them if they’re comfortable with that. And yeah, I hate that couples who play video games together are viewed as weird/creepy/dysfunctional. Gaming’s always better with a pal, anyway!
July 17th, 2008 at 8:51 pm
Mercedes-
Hee, I hear you. I remember my mother trying to play the original Super Mario Brothers back in the day, and… no. She was one of those people who flung the controller itself in whatever direction she wanted Mario to go, rather than pushing the buttons. I remember thinking it was hilarious.
That was the only time either of them ever really tried. It just wasn’t something they were into, although my mom did peek in on Final Fantasy Seven when I was playing it on winter break, and cried at Aerith’s death scene, mostly because “that little girl with the ugly yellow shoes like your father is so sad!” (She meant Yuffie; at the time my father wore these horrific yellow waterproof duck shoes to work, and she thought Yuffie had similar shoes.)
The only other game either of them has ever been remotely interested in is Microsoft Flight Simulator, which my dad uses as a substitute for the fact that his eyesight was never good enough for the Air Force.
July 19th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Lol @ vlad’s reference to the WoW guy in South Park XDDD
Yeah on XBL, ahhh the kids are hilaaaaaaaarious XD It makes me laugh hearing a high pitched “Fuck you hoe!!” through the mic.. me and my friends get a kick out of their insults.
Although, we did meet up with a guy on XBL who was really really skilled and he’d always play with us so we told him to get a mic. He greets us with this high pitched voice and he’s obviously a youngun (although I still dont know how old he is exactly) but he is AWESOME so we don’t care.. We’ll tease him every now and then but then he shoots a “Well let’s go 1-on-1!!” and that usually shuts us up =P
July 20th, 2008 at 5:55 am
nice article and any body trys 2 piss me off in CoD 3 be prepared 4 a zombie-esque decapitation via shotgun
July 20th, 2008 at 9:52 pm
And atleast once in your life on the gaming web…
“What are you? 12?” “You’re probably 10, go play pokemon. Just stop playing.”
You witness something similar to that idea between two angry gamers. I have really grown tired of attempting to honestly convince my age, because it’s completely meaningless against ignorance at the computer screen. I may slip a very unprofessional comment while under pressure, which would possibly lead to being thought as immature. But when that happens, I start to regain my cool and think rationally and let the person become aware of their hypocrisy.
I find it comical to think that some people assume of others a very young age and at the same time their vocabulary and speech are poor while attempting to domineer. And it makes them look worse the younger the age they suggest of the target, especially in front of bystanders of the conflict. They’re just buildng onto their repulse.
July 22nd, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Video Games are just a form of entertainment like TV, Movies, Music, Art, Plays, etc. Why people assume that only one age group can enjoy it is beyond me.
I hate being mistaken for a kid on XBL
I swear i don’t sound like i’m 10 in real life! I SWEAR!!!!!